Inside the building sakinah family, one of the most important efforts is to choose the right partner. So how to choose a partner to head the family sakinah? In choosing a partner, there is the role of taste and there is the role of science. Feeling fit is often more 'correct' than scientific considerations If a woman in the first encounter with a man immediately felt that he feels comfortable to be a husband, although he did not yet know in detail who the identity of the man, usually a factor that comfortable feeling will be a factor dominant consideration. Of course there are people who were deceived by hallo efec, which immediately attracted by the appearance, when in fact a false appearance.
Meanwhile, rational arguments based on comprehensive data on various aspects of male or female characteristics, may be able to satisfy the logic, but may feel dry, because marriage is not simply a problem of logic, but more precisely a matter of feeling. There is a couple of terms of the logical infrastructure (for example, both handsome and beautiful, old age, the house where he lived a good, sufficient income, the completeness of the complete life) should be happy, but the couple that just passed his days with the atmosphere dry and boring, because hubunganya more formal than the taste. Feeling comfortable and fit will be able to distort a variety of shortcomings, so even though they live in simplicity, but they are rich with feeling, so they can feel crowded in keberduaan, feeling festive in the silence of the night, feeling the burden lighter, feeling a moment in a long journey. They have passed the age of 40 years of marriage, but seemed still newlyweds.
Religion is to guide our lives, therefore, guidance is also in line with the mind (logic) and feelings in general. Allah created us with nature has a tendency (lust) that is universal as it is called in the Quran. 'Cite this as a wonderful in (the view) the human love of what is desirable, namely wanita2, kids, a treasure that many of these types of gold, silver, horse selection, cattle and rice fields. That's the pleasure of living in the world and on the back of good places Allah SWT(heaven) Q / 3:14)
It is human if we are attracted to the opposite sex, are proud to have many children, successful, happy to have valuables, great vehicles, extensive gardens and livestock. We are human like the pleasure, pride and comfort. Throughout syahwatnya accomplished correctly and legal (lawful), then it could be something that is considered worship, or at least permissible, it is not haram. If a man wants to have a beautiful wife and the wealthy, or a woman wants to have a handsome and wealthy husband, then it is lust lust as a fair and legitimate because it is attached to God's nature to us.
But we also have carnal lust as well. Eve or are in the Indonesian language is called lust is the impetus (lust) to something that is low, right away, and ignored the moral values, or what Freud called the id, ie aspects of the human animal, from the structure of id, ego and the superego (animal, outsmart and moral). If people in choosing more depangaruhi by air, then kecenderunganya is on immediate enjoyment or even a momentary pleasure, rather than eternal happiness. If people in choosing more influenced by the guidance of conscience and religion, then pertimbangannnya more on choosing eternal happiness, though it has been imagined to be beyond the first phases of patience in the face of hardship and bitterness of life. Religion, as recommended by the Prophet to give guidance in choosing a mate. There are four considerations that are socially always be considered in a potential mate will be chosen, namely wealth, lineage, beauty, descent and religion. That is, the couple were married for four considerations, wealth, nasabnya, her beauty and her religion. Choose a partner because of his religion inevitably you're lucky. (H. R. Bukhari and Muslim from Abu Hurairah).